Always the Optimist!!

Every day when I go out into the world, I open my eyes wide, look around me, and am amazed at what I can find. I am an optimist who looks for the beauty and believes the best about people! Would the DARE to AFFIRM philosophy have been born without this approach? You bet not! Right now, I am looking for signs of Spring. Last week, I saw some leaves ready to pop open. A few days ago, I saw these daffodils bravely popping up through the snow and today I saw pussy willows with their little furry buds!! What more can a girl ask for?!? Well...
Allison and I have been working on creating so many training topics. We have developed these in each of the four categories of the DARE to AFFIRM process - Discovering and Nurturing Self
Affirming others
Respecting and Relating
Engaging, Encouraging and Empowering
As Spring is coming - of this we can be sure, we are heading out on the confernce circuit in NJ, DE, and PA! Soon we hope to add NY and MD!! We will be meeting and greeing thousands of like minded spirits, networking with fellow presenters, and gathering lots of stories for the Blog and our training.
Today we spent the day developing the content for TOUCH training. It's awesome how many ways we touch and are touched - spiritually, emotionally and physically. Touch is so central to relationship building.
We look forward to meeting and greeting so many of YOU in our travels.
Thanks for being so supportive and believing in our message. Your words to us definitely let us know that we are doing important things!!

Kia Ora Y'all From New Zealand!!

Miriam McCaleb had to hang another load of washing on the line and frolic in the ocean with her daughter, but she took time to share with us first! Thanks!!
"Greetings to DARE to AFFIRM from the summery South Pacific from a Tennessean New Zealander. I find your vision and energy are so delicious and I just wish I could create situations where my favourite thinkers from this side of the ocean and that could be together and realize how remarkable it is that we're speaking the same language and thinking of the same things without consciously trying to.
My family gets truckloads of attention from me, and then the circles of connection move out through extended family, friends, neighbours and some attention to those farther removed...but they still get it.
Eye contact, smiles and greetings, questions and kisses and cuddles are freely given as benefit the nature of the relationship. I try to have connection all over the place, always trying to learn the names of the individuals in the little mobs of teens in our neighbourhood - and I greet them warmly. I specifically tell friends or colleagues or the purveyors of fine snacks in cafes 'I appreciate you'.
EVERYONE IN THE RELATIONSHIP BENEFITS. Anybody watching or paying attention is learning and benefitting from my every interaction, so I actively make them all magnificent!
I catch people doing something right ALL THE BLOODY TIME. This is true of relationships with adults and very true of relationships with "children" of all ages.
And ooooooooooooooooooooooh how exciting that I am to receive a gift for my entry though I was fully expecting I had already received my gift: THE INTANGIBLE DELIGHT OF SUPPORTING OTHERS.

Ashley's Affirmations

A few weeks ago, I was sitting in Borders in DE when I looked over at the table next to me. There a young woman had cards, markers, stickers and more fun "stuff" to make prizes. Since I am a curious individual, I asked what was going on and if I could sit down to learn more. The answer I received was a warm and welcoming smile. We introduced ourselves and I was pleased to meet Ashley Brown. She wears many hats. The one she was wearing when we met was that of a before and after school teacher at Tender Loving Kare Private School and Day Care in Bear, DE. Here is her story about what she was doing that day. Ashley entered our contest!!

"I give affirmation to everyone I come in contact with including family, my students, co-workers and to people I meet everyday. I am in a business where we are constantly around people and are meeting new people so I am usually "other driven" and take time out to make sure other people know that I appreciate them. (Ashley and her husband have a business, Financial Solutions Provider in Wilmington, DE)

One way that Martie caught me affirming others is with a card I made for my before-care program students at TLK. My students, ages 6-10 years old, were challenged to play the quiet game and the winner would receive a prize. Of course, 13 out of 15 students won the game, so I decided to make cards for them and tell them in the card how I appreciated their awesome behavior and am blessed to have them as my students. Each card was multi-colored and had the first initial of their name on the front. The next day in the classroom, I hid each card somewhere in the room and let the kids know they had to find their individual prizes. They LOVED this idea, and said, "This was fun Mrs. Ashley. Thank you!" I enjoyed watching them search for and then open the cards. Something so small turned out to mean so much. I was affirmed by their joy!

An added thought on Ashley's email: "Life is not measured by the number of breaths you take, but by the number of moments that take your breath away."
Send in your contest entry and see your story here on the blog!
Go to our web-site for details about entering http://www.daretoaffirm.com/

Unity...and Diversity with Crazy Quilters

This quilt won BEST of SHOW at the Garden Patch Quilt Show at the Wheaton Arts Center in Milville, NJ March 15, 2008!! CONGRATS!!

Today I want to acknowledge a group of women in New Jersey that call themselves South Jersey Crazy Quilters! They are unique individuals who all express themselves through their designs and stitches. If you could look at this "challenge project" that they have just completed, you will find something the same in each of the 20 squares. Each person received a piece of the same fabric with bright colors, butterflies and bugs and flowers on it. They had to create a square for the quilt that included this. They had two months to do it.
THERE THE SIMILARITIES ENDED!!
The women are in the "mid-life range" from early 40s through - well "mom" is 95 next month!! and quite fascinating in the ways they express themselves.
If you could look closely, you would see that one person took the fabric and a little piece with a flower and used traditional colors. Others went to the opposite extreme and picked up the brightness of the oranges and yellows and pinks.
This was a "no rules" project - except for making sure the square was the right size and a piece of the fabric was included.
To complete this chapter of the story, the quilt was stitched together and embellished on all of the seams. It is important to affirm the energy and skills of a very special "leader", Jeanne Hagerman, the founder of the group, who guided the task. She is amazing and needs to be recognized and thanked! No, she did not do it alone, but she was the guiding light and a powerful set of "nimble hands".
Why do I share this story? We talk about affirming and valuing others and we recognized Jeanne. We also must recognize the other 19 women who brought their creativity and individuality to this project. It shows that we are all the same...all crazy quilters, yet we are each so different too in the way we choose colors, assemble our square and stitch.
IT IS NO DIFFERENT FROM EACH OF US IN EVERYTHING WE DO IN OUR LIVES. We are all one, yet we are all different. In realizing the sameness and respecting the differences, our lives are stitched together like the patterns of the crazy quilt. Like the quilt, there is UNITY for all of us, created by combining our originality and working to accomplish shared missions.
P.S. Watch for this quilt to be entered in quilt shows. We have also documented each square - and like each of us, recording our stories will add value to the quilt's historical value.

Discover DORA and her CONTAGIOUS LAUGH!

Almost 25 years ago, I heard the LAUGH and it affected my life. What I know for sure is that this has happened to just about everyone that Dora Hunter comes in contact with. First you hear the laugh, then you see the giant smile that lights up her face and then you are hooked! Then she was a thirty-something wife, mom, daughter, sister and friend. Over the years, Dora has added many other roles to her always busy life (never giving up the original ones) - a family child care provider, a grandmother, an advisor and counselor, and the best friend many people could ever ask for.
Dora has been a mentor and role model to generations, affecting the lives of the children in her care and their families. She is always ready for advice - when asked - and that is the important piece. Well, she does admit that sometimes, when she sees a situation that is not respectful and nurturing, she won't hesitate to approach a child or a parent and share her thoughts. Her strong family connections and values guide her words and actions.
Over the years, Dora and I have danced in and out of many experiences, trading places as the leader and follower when we knew it was right. We could teach each other so much and she always had several words of advice for me. I want to share those with you:
1. Lighten up!! I even have a big elf hand puppet that she named Lighten Up)
2. Flush it!! Important words for Letting Go!! Thanks Dora!
We talked last week about DARE to AFFIRM and the four levels of nurturing and affirming. We know that we are well versed in the levels of affirming, relationship building and encouraging/empowering others. What we also admit is that we "slip" when it comes to the piece about affirming and nurturing self.
We wondered how many others did just the same.
Additional wise thoughts from Dora:
A. Many people just don't know how to give praise and encouragement -or to receive it
B. Others are really good at praise and encouragement because they try to make up for what they did not get in their lives growing up.
C. So many people are "dying" because they aren't acknowledged.
D. EACH OF US IN OUR SPECIAL WAY CAN DO WHAT WE CAN TO MAKE OTHERS FEEL GOOD ABOUT THEMSELVES. Sometimes it just takes a smile.
E. Every day we wake up and are given so many more opportunities to practice it all - and have gratitude for those in our lives.
THANKS DORA for so many LIFE'S LESSONS.

CONTEST! CONTEST! CONTEST!

DARE to AFFIRM is having a CONTEST! We ask for your entries that only take a few minutes of reflection and writing about YOU and who you are, what you believe and what you do!!

Sounds simple! It is and we have already received entries from California and New Zealand and inquries from Wyoming - as well as lots of local folks in the tri-state area of NJ, DE and PA

EVERYONE IS A WINNER!! and will receive a special thank you prize for entering.

NO, it is NOT an all expenses paid "cruise" with these able bodies sailors. It is a surprise!

HOW DO YOU ENTER? Go to our web-site http://www.daretoaffirm.com/ to see the questions we ask you to respond to.

WHAT WILL WE DO WITH THE RESPONSES? Two things:

1. Recognize you on the blog or web-site (Respectfully, with your permission of course)

2. Create written materials for all of you so that you can gather ideas, strategies and techniques that work for others - and make them work in your own life.

THANK YOU for the time you will take to respond to us.

YOU ARE VALUABLE and WE AFFIRM YOU.

Remember - EVERYONE has wise words to contribute. What someone thinks is "nothing" might be just the solution that someone else is seeking in his/her life! WOW

DARE to AFFIRM and Catch YOU and others doing something right

PS: If you would rather call and talk about your responses, that would be great...

(856) 256-8380.

LOVE, HAPPINESS & SERENITY

We go through life according to our beliefs. I choose to keep some special angels on the desk in front of me to remind me of what is important in life. They all have names and they all are special. Today I choose to share the Angel of Happiness and the Angel of Serenity. The one reminds me that being peaceful is nurturing to my body, mind and spirit. The other reminds me that happiness is not something to be earned, but something that is!! It is within all of us as long as we believe. Ah, but do all of our beliefs work for us? I would like to think so, but do know otherwise. How can we change this?
AFFIRMATIONS: these are simple statements made on purpose to change some aspect of our lives. The more we do them, the more our behavior becomes like them! So let's concentrate on creating affirmations to empower and strengthen ourselves. Remember that we have control over our reactions to our world. Affirmations are strong positive statements that tell us that EVERYTHING IS WELL despite what the mind might be saying to us. We create positive thoughts to replace the negative ones.
IF YOU SAY THE AFFIRMATIONS ENOUGH, YOU WILL BELIEVE THEM.
OK...let's get you started on the process. Just reading and/or saying these words everyday will make you stronger whether you believe them...yet...or not. It can turn into a habit that represents a way of life - a POSITIVE one of LOVING YOURSELF.
Start by taking some time to think about areas in your life you would like to improve and how you might want your life to be. Write the most important one/s down in a list. Use one of these to write an affirmation for YOU!
Take a 3x5 card and write a positive statement on it:
"I am filled with energy"
"My body loves to exercise"
"I enjoy food that is healthy and nurturing"
"I believe in myself"
"I am at peace with myself"
"I have a fulfilling job"
1. Make sure that the words are written in the present tense.
2. Be positive.
3. These can either be spoken or written - or both.
4. Repitition is critical. Every time you say the statement, do it 10 times.
It takes 21 days to make a habit permanent
Remember the message of DARE TO AFFIRM - catch them doing something right and nurture and affirm it - THIS INCLUDES YOU.
Visit our website: http://www.daretoaffirm.com/ to see details about our contest and how you can enter. We ask you to share your words on how your nurture and affirm yourself and others. Everyone is a winner!!